another day full of memories......

so... tomorrow is marks birthday. i hate that there are so many days in the year that will bring up the memory of people lost. it is also a good thing too but right now its hard to see the good side, currently these kinda days just make me feel empty all over again, especially with mark. i still cant quite come to terms with it all even now. i missed his funeral because i was on a plane to ecuador and i think for me that has had a massive impact on the reality of it all for me. it just feels like hes still at uni but then days like tomorrow come along, and thats when you know that something isnt right because instead of all going out to the pub, were all sat being quiet, thinking, remembering.....